I put a video about boobs out in October on my YouTube channel. My intention was to remind viewers to love yourself, your body, your boobs just the way they are! (A common theme among my videos). But what a few viewers took away was that I’m judgmental and close-minded about beauty and plastic surgery. And so after responding to a few of those critics and reviewing my video and feeling like perhaps I hadn’t articulated myself the way I would have liked due to exhaustion and lack of time, I considered deleting my video.
I’ve never deleted a YouTube video before. I suppose I’ve also never had the kind of negative response to one of my videos before. People may not always like or agree with my videos but it’s usually some issue on their end, but this time I was really feeling like I had made a mistake in posting my opinion. But then…I realized exactly that. I posted MY OPINION. My channel is about giving advice and accepting yourself for who you are, but it’s still just all MY opinion. I’m not a trained professional on life. And if I took my video down I wouldn’t be being true to myself and my channel. And how does that fit into my channel’s message?
So this is a PSA. Be true to yourself, guys. That’s really the only person you can be and also be happy. Anyone else you attempt to be for whatever reason is never going to make you as happy or as fulfilled as just being yourself will. I struggle in life to be true to myself. You might not believe that. “Oh Kaitlyn! But you’ve got it so together! Look how happy you are in your videos!” When in reality I’m falling apart sometimes. Many times I feel like I have to act a certain way or (pretend like I) think a certain way in order to fit in and be accepted and not cause controversy. But the truth is, I do have controversial opinions. EVERYONE has controversial opinions because everyone doesn’t have the same opinion so someone is always going to find a controversy in there. I feel like I censor myself so much everyday because I have to put out a certain image. An acceptable image. And I’m bombarded every day through every form of media about what that acceptable image is supposed to be. It changes daily, HOURLY. And it’s exhausting. There are many times I do get to “be true myself,” but unfortunately, there are many more that I feel pigeon-holed and persecuted for being anything other than what people expect. I just hope that if today, you’re struggling with deciding whether or not to stand up and be YOU or to continue being who others want you to be or who you think you should be rather than who you are, that you’ll read this and stop. And just be yourself. You might only be able to do it for a few hours or days, before falling back into feeling too controversial or too wacky and “out-there” for society, but I can promise that you’ll feel better for having done it. My hope is that eventually we can all be ourselves without having to cater to other’s desires or opinions. It’s not today for everyone, but it can be for you.